You know, I thought I had seen it all when this headline proved me wrong today: “Woman Sues Doctors After Failed Abortion.” Some genius, age 45, went in for an abortion about a month into her pregnancy. I don’t know what the doctor did or didn’t do, but somehow the abortion didn’t “take,” and the woman was still pregnant, but she managed to remain ignorant of that fact for the next six months, until she went to another doctor complaining of pelvic pain, at which point she was informed that the bun was still in the oven. She gave birth a few months later and now, with her daughter about two years old, she is suing Doctor #1 for child support. This blows my mind on several levels. First, how do you fail to abort a walnut-sized fetus? Second, how could you fail to notice a pregnancy for SIX MONTHS? I’ve never been with child (knock wood), so maybe I’m just being ignorant, but I think there would be some pretty clear signs that something’s going on down there. Third, if she was so against having the child in the first place, and was so unable to take care of it once she had it that she has to sue a Planned Parenthood doctor for child support (I guess daddy is not part of the equation), why on earth didn’t she put the poor kid up for adoption? I really try to give those less fortunate than I the benefit of many, many doubts for all kinds of crazy behavior, but then someone so monumentally stupid comes along and makes me start ranting like Archie Bunker. Ugh, that poor child.